Marrying a marine agent as a wife

10:11

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Revival

I perceive that God has designed it that men and women who will serve Him should pass through different spiritual wilderness experiences. The tough challenges of this School of adversity is expected to draw the man or woman closer to God and cause him learn how to pray fervently until victory is achieved.

The problem now is that the wilderness is full of enemies, the Amelekites, the Perezites, The Jebusites, and the giants who have refused to let them go. One of such enemy confronting existing and upcoming ministers of God today is the error of marrying ladies sent to destroy them from the marine kingdom.

These ladies are enemies of destiny prepared by Satan and his kingdom to stop the kingdom assignment of the prophet, Pastor or man of God. I have seen great prophets of God who see vision clearly and prophesy accurately, yet they are still struggling in ministry because the activities of the internal enemies.

The error is so grievous that when you marry the daughter of Satan, the devil has unfettered access to yout. It becomes a tragedy that a man called by God to destroy the works of Satan, ends up marrying the daughter of Satan as his wife, such a Pastor will suffer long in the wilderness of life.

The choice of a life partner can be an icebreaker that could make or breaking the man. It can determine how far and successful the man will go in life. If you get it right, God applauds you with open heavens and blessings (Prov18:22), if otherwise,  the heaven closes over you and the consequences can be painful and frustrating.  

The reason for this blog is to expose the strategy of Satan in this area and warn young  and single Pastors and ministers to beware.  It is also to help those men of God who are suffering this problem in silence to know that deliverance is available through Jesus Christ.

MARRYING A MARINE AGENT AS WIFE

Let me start by advising young men who are in love with a sister they intend to Marty to look beyond the beauty, but rather ask God to reveal the spiritual position of the lady and her parents to you before you propose her.

It is not enough for her to be intelligent, well educated and cultured. Beauty is not the first qualification for a woman of God, it is her love for God and her fear of the Lord.  When God reveals the family of the girl as lovers of God, then you add her beauty and other qualities as genuine. If this enquiry is not made or God simply decided not to answer you, then you don't have a bride yet.

To say that you love her so much as to ignore this simple spiritual enquiry is foolishness. If you become obsessed by her beauty and outward commitment to the things of God in your local church and ignore to enquire about her parents, don't be surprised if you discover later that your innocent-looking girl is the daughter of an occultic grand master, by which time, it is too late to make amends.

By the time you have married her, you know you have broken the hedge, get ready for battle, for the serpent will surely bite.  She will be a thorn on your flesh till God delivers you from their network.

This was how my 18years of fierce spiritual battle started. I was a young man with so much love for the things of God and highly committed in my local church. Though I knew I had a Call, it was not confirmed and I was not a Pastor yet. I loved righteousness and had no girlfriend before meeting her, but my spiritual understanding was low. I believed all things as the bible said we should. I never knew that you should test all spirit before you believe.

After three years in marriage without a baby and nothing seem to be working for me, I began to question everything around the marriage and my complaints did not go down well with my wife who contacted her family and the real battle began. This gentle looking lady began to deal wisely with me, frustrating in the spirit, every move I made for employmet,  business  and in ministry for the next fifteen years.

I loved my wife and cannot imagine she could have a hand in my misfortune, talk less of her being responsible for spiritual roadblocks to hinder my progreas.  She became more subtle and followed me closely into every business undertaking I ventured into.

TARGET OF THE DEVIL

There are two categories of servants of God the enemy target with his daughters from the water. These are: 

1. People with oil of God on their head, who are not even aware. 

2. The second category are young and unmarried  Pastors, Ministers and Evangelist in churches who are getting ready to enter the ministry. 

WHAT IS THE PURPOSE AND PLAN OF SATAN

The primary purpose of Satan and the agent sent on the assignment are:

1. The first plot is to hold the man down, divert his attention from the work of God into other areas of life and gradually kill his vision.

2. Take away his means of livelihood (Employment or business) and ensure money does not flow into his account from anywhere. When that happens, power has been wrestled from him at home.

3. Make sure his Ministry never see the light of day. If it does, do every thing possible to close it down. 

4. lf he insist on ministry, manipulate him to a fake Prophet, who will initiate him into the marine kingdom and give him fake power. 

5. When the above fails, then that Pastor is in for endless spiritual battles meant to purnish him and if possible destroy him.

MARINE KINGDOM

It is a living spiritual kingdom established by Satan when he was driven down from heaven. The marine Kingdom initiates and support every plan to turn man away from God in disobedience.

Because the spiritual controls the physical, they are more powerful than any natural man’s imaginations and thoughts.  They have spiritual beings - kings and queens presiding inside the water. On earth here, they have their agents everywhere, who gather every night to discuss the kingdom of Satan and how to make the people commit more sin and rebel against God to their destruction.

These agents live amongst us, attend churches, some even preach the gospel of Jesus Christ, but inwardly, they are agents doing the agenda of their master the devil. 

They have a spiritual eyes that can see into the spirit realm at any time to know what will happen and with these secrets, its easy for them to steal or divert the blessings of people. 

In the world today, the marine kingdom is responsible for 70 – 80% of the troubles of man.  From divorce, pornography, bizarre nakedness, prostitution are caused by marine spirits. Today, marine spirit tell people to walk naked on the beach. They have devised new methods  to initiate young people into prostitution through online registers. They tell people to sleep around, irrespective of what the word of God says. The aim is to ruin the youths and society in general. 

In the Western world, their members manufacture cosmetics, jewelries, bangles, cosmetics,  sex toys, artificial Virginia, cream for  enlargement of pennis, sexually motivating drugs and so on. 

There are several marine spirits (demons) which could possess a man and use him/her to achieve the purposes   of satan.  Some of these include:

1.Celibate marine 

2.Marine Jezebel

3.Marine witchcraft

4.Leviathan spirit

Let me discuss a little about some of these spirits.

Celibate marine spirit – These are spirit that operate in the lives of marine agents who are consecrated to the work of satan and to wickedness.  They have no interest in getting married, but if they get married, they do not want to have children. Their wives cannot enjoy the marriage and she will soon leave or get killed.   This spirit operate in the lives of most Territorial strongmen of Satan.

Marine Jezebel spirit – operate in both male and female. They are more active in their female members.  Such women are usually fashion conscious, rebellious and aggressive. They seek to control and dominate their husband and will not stop till they achieve their purpose.

Leviathan Spirit – This is a brutal marine spirit responsible for mass killing.  People possessed by this spirit are usually filled with suicide thoughts.  They walk alone when they are planning evil, so that no one will get to know and then try to discourage them. When you read that a boy shot 15 of his class mates, Leviathan spirit had possessed him.  This is the spirit that posses a young man and cause him to kill an unfaithful lover, her mother and brother all at once for the offense of the girl. 

Marine Witchcraft spirit – This is the main spirit that operate in the agents sent from the water as wives.  They operate like mother witches. They are subtle, yet deadly. They have the power to leave their body into the water (spirit) at any time to do evil.

HOW DO THE MARINE KINGDOM EXECUTE THEIR PLAN:

The devil hates anyone who could be a threat to his kingdom. So, the plan to arrested an anointed servant of God, even before he enters the ministry is one of the strategic weapons of Satan against the Church.

The devil will present innocent looking ladies from the water to a young man committed to serving God, or to a young unmarried Pastor.  These young ladies operate with high level of secrecy, patience and deception.

  

They would normally have good education, appear well cultured, obedient and humble. They pretend to be born again to win the heart of the man and prepare the ground for his down-fall.  Majority of them also have wealthy family background. 

They come lovely at the beginning with the air of a spirit-filled born-again daughter of God who cannot hurt a fly. She would not be the flashy girl that wear trousers, or make-up excessively; No, she would present herself as that committed sister, a soul winner and a worthy labourer in the vineyard of the Lord, and the Pastor would unfortunately accept all these fake report as true. 

So, she is seen as an ideal wife for a man of God. The marriage is quickly arranged and consummated.  From my experience, 90% of these delicate marriages are made when the men are not deep in God, though they are born-again, so adequate spiritual investigation are not carried out.

SIGNS THAT YOU ARE IN THE BONDAGE OF STRANGE WIFE:

1. When you discover that shortly after your marriage, things began to fall apart for you. Things that were easy before that time are no longer easy.

2. When you loose your means of livelihood shortly after your wedding, say within two years after your marriage.

3. When your wife does not like to have any of your relation living with you or around you.

4. When your wife find it easy to relate with men instead of women. She is comfortable with male friends in the office and in the compound as though there is nothing to worry about.

5. When your wife joins you in every business endeavour you venture into, whether she understands the business or not. 

6. When your wife likes to make casual visit to her male colleagues and if you allow will like to retain some of her male schoolmate friends. They fall cheaply to male marine agents and value their friendship a lot.

7. When your wife tells you she will not like to have more than  3(Three) children. She would normally have no reason for that decision, except to live a vibrant life.

8. When there is barrenness in marriage for five or more years and it does not bother your wife and her family. 

9. When your effort to succeed in career or business is always doubted by your wife.

10. When your wife begins to spread the news that the barrenness in your marriage is due to the husband's low sperm count.

11. When your ideas discredited by your wife fail on execution regularly. 

12. When your wife is happy to be the "bread winner".  Believes her income is sufficient for the family.

13. When your wife keep asking whether your effort will yield any positive result.

14. When your wife suggests you should focus on business or career instead of ministry.

15. When in ministry and your wife is continually doubting your Calling just because the church has only few members.

16. When you find it very difficult to obtain help from known and unknown sources. When favour  is completely hard to come bye.

17. When you are in ministry and your wife continues in her old church.

 

CONCLUSION

This is a serious problem facing Pastors and vibrant men of God today. It is capable of wasting the entire effort of the Pastor and send him to hell fire. These women are destiny hunters who will eventually initiate the children born to the marriage and use their star to gain promotion in the covin.

I fought this battle for many years before victory started coming.  I resisted the conditions I found myself, but found out there was no one to help me. Families and friends deserted me and I was alone. 

When the battle became tough, the network of human demons, Rulers of darkness were gathered against me. As God would have it, the first grand master and strongman in charge died. 

The Lord arrested him and the battle changed, became tougher. When the Pastor is about to be completely delivered, the battle becomes very brutal, the devil increases the powers of the woman, but God would always show you that you are higher than her and even the territorial strongman.

Thank God for our Saviour Jesus Christ who conquered Satan and handed victory to us.

After eighteen years, God turned around my captivity, put me in charge, renewed His Calling upon my life and gave me fresh priority areas to attend to in ministry.

God can do the same for you speedily. With prophetic insight and guidance, your deliverance and restoration will depend on your willingness to obey instruction.  The question is not who saw your star when you were born. No! The question is what have you done to regain your freedom?  

The Lord God Almighty will give you the keys to your freedom as you join us this  month in our Fire in my bone conference.  

Please send an email to register. 

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HELP- Office romance is destroying homes

10:02

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Revival

I have a burden for marriages and I'm concerned about the way our behavior and conduct directly or indirectly erodes family values and put marriages in danger. Some of our married sisters have continued to behave as single ladies years after marriage.  There is always a line drawn after marriage for jokes, play and familiarity in general. 

Today, many marriages are sick to the point of comatose because of ignorance, "I don't care attitude and disobedience to the word of God. Some couples are already exploring strange ways to find satisfaction in life as marriage they say, has not been fair to them. Though office romance may not be the only reason for the many separations and divorces we are seeing in marriage today, it has contributed to it or worsened the menace. 

Many who have made their mark in life, intelligent and successful young people have been leveled and brought low in marriage, partly because marriage has no quick fix.  The couples must work out their marriage and commit to its success. They must fear God, love themselves and refuse to be seperated by friends and relatives.

They must also be Committed to the success of their relationship. Marriage is a long distance marathon race, not a sprint. It is not in marriage today that the man will continue to boss the wife around or ignore her feelings, also the wife that thinks because she earns more money than the husband, she will no longer submit to him is not doing well. These are some of the realities that are threatening marriages and frustrating couples, not forgetting childlessness and enemies behind the scene. 

Frustrated women easily fall prey to mischievous male colleagues who try to comfort them with fake words and compliments. Many ladies fall flat to this smart trap, saying her colleague appreciates them more than their husband.This is usually the loophole the enemy uses to gain a foothold on the marriage to attack it either that time or later in the future.

  

This is because even if the situation is resolved, women hardly close the door of friendship they opened with one or two colleagues during the challenging times. This is one of the ways office romance start for some ladies.

Infidelity or marital unfaithfulness is seriously threatening families today because of lack of fear of God and indiscipline. Many young people think that sleeping with senior officers will give them protection and promotion. In the financial institution, this is very rampant.  Divorcées, single mothers and widowers in high positions entice younger men with pecks in order to satisfy their lust, and many aggressive young married men start platonic relationship with charming ladies, which develop with time to threaten their marriages.  What then is office romance?

OFFICE ROMANCE:

This is a simply relationship with a colleague in the office. It is common with spinsters and bachelors who think maybe they can meet their love in the office or those who just cannot control their emotions.  It becomes a worrisome matter when married people are involved. when married men or women abandons their spouse for the man or lady they met in the office, the effect of such relationship, no matter how they cover it, will affect their marriages and relationship at home many years after they have left the work. It could lead to separation, divorce or even untimely death.  Though many reputable organizations frown at it and others has strict rules forbidding it, it however still thrives underground.

Office romance has its price, apart from destroying the home. It causes low productivity and waters-down the authority of a compromising officer over the subordinates. If you are the manager and happen to misbehave with your subordinate, you loose your authority in that office, as your other workers will easily question your judgement. 

Young people who find it difficult to control their emotions will always have their fingers burnt due to office romance. They loose their jobs for sometimes milling round their boss mistress.

HOW DOES IT START

In a lot of ways and for many varied reasons, people become drawn to each other in the work place. Some guys will just start greeting and complimenting a married woman/lady, telling her how beautiful she looks.  This behavior is continued until it permeates the lady’s heart and she begins to pay attention to the guy and her dressing everyday.

Some other people devise their own methods of getting close to their target lady or man.  It always ends in a wrong way with one person bearing the brunt, It bring down morale and authority in the work place and many times lead to reduced productivity.

Once in place, office affair make people look forward to going to the office rather than being with their family. It causes people to leave home early in the morning and return very late at night on the excuse of overtime or work overload.

Whenever one is in place, an observant husband or wife will notice the eagerness of his partner to go early to work. Also, there will be a subtle efforts on the partner having the affair to dress better in order to please his office boss/mistress/lover. 

REASONS FOR OFFICE ROMANCE

There are many factors responsible for this unhealthy behaviour, but the truth is that most women who do this does not understand their responsibility in marriage. Marriage is a union and not a joining together that leaves any part wholly or partly independent.

After marriage, the lady’s body is not her own alone, but that of  the husband also.  Some of the reasons advanced by women are sickening. Here are some of them:

1. Some women have high sexual drive which their husband cannot meet up with. From where did they get the high sexual drive? - some of them are exposured to blue films and pornography. .After hiding to watch those crazy drug propelled women, without any value for their body, they want to practice same at home. Sister/madam, you are trying to kill your husband!

2. Other women are doing it. hmnnn, who are those other women. some of then are widows, single mothers and divorcees and women who have separated from their husband. These women eager for companion because some of them are lonely.

Instead of them to look up to God and trouble God with prayer without season according to 1 Thessalonians 5:17, some of them are going about helping themselves, falling easily to younger men and sometimes boys. I once stumbled on a young boy who they say was a "powerhouse"; to a matured single mother in Abuja. But unknown to the woman, the young man was also "power housing" the woman's housemaid. This is evil. 

What are the other reasons?

3. They stay long hours in the office, get familiar and share information and jokes. Is all these any cogent reason to destroy your home and/or loose eternity? NO.

4. To get promotion in a competitive and highly rewarding environment.

5. Frustration in their marriage - These category of women discuss their marriage freely with some colleagues who pretend to care about them and even love them more than their husbands. These fake compliments and relationship eventually work against the marriage of the lady.

6. The next reason is laughable - meeting a dude (whatever these funny words mean) who has so much confidence, drive and creativity like their husband. Can you imagine this kind of grammer coming from a married woman. 

A believer working in the office either within or outside his state, should realize the burden of trust and responsibility God and marriage placed on them.  Without knowing some of these basics, and being guided by them, a lot of ladies carry on with their spinster attires, dressing, talking and cracking corrupt jokes with colleagues.  

Some even fill the overtime sheet willing to work after hours. Tell me,  in which reasonable office are married women who have their home and children to care of, are asked to work overtime. I believe that lack of Word of God is also a factor. Where is infidelity when the word of God is dwelling inside of us. 

The Word of God restrain us from many worldly desires and behaviour and focus our mind on the right things. All the talk of high sexual drive would be curtailed as they are caused by things we choose to expose ourselves to. All the lack of interest in sex, low libido, unnecessary use of sexually motivating drugs and drinks will be a thing of the past. Also, with God in a marriage, couples will jointly and honestly address any sexual difficulties that come the way of their joy in marriage.

  

Any one going into marriage as a Christian should know that marriage is responsibility and not a child’s play.  Marriage is a place to fulfill God’s plan for your life and that of your family. Any one going into marriage should also know that marriage is built on God’s Word, love and trust.

If God is not in your marriage, then Tom, dick and Harry will manipulate and influence the marriage and eventually destroy it. But, if God be in your marriage, by this I mean that both of you have given your heart to Jesus Christ, then the fear of God will guide you.

Love and trust are basic to any successful union. This trust must never be broken as it could bring the relationship to an end. Some people find it difficult to forgive their unfaithful partners, while some think their unfaithful partners cannot change. All these bring strife which eventually bring separation or divorce. Because trust takes time to build, and it strengthens the love among couples, I will suggest the following helpful tips and  guidelines for young people.

CODE OF CONDUCT FOR WORKING CLASS MARRIED WOMAN

Let our sisters take note of the following rules also: 

OFFICE CONDUCT RULES:

1."TAKE YOUR EYES OFF THE OPPOSITE SEX!

2. " AVOID BODILY CONTACT WITH THE  OPPOSIT SEX (STRANGERS)" in the office

3. DON'T DISCUSS YOUR MARRIAGE WITH A THIRD PARTY.

4. MAKE A VOW OF CHASTITY

5. HANDLE YOUR BODY WITH HONOUR

6. COMMIT TO THE SUCCESS OF YOUR MARRIAGE

7. NO SCANTY DRESSING.

DANGERS OF OFFICE ROMANCE:

1. Loss of employment.

2. Loss of respect among colleagues.

3. Moral burden and betrayal of trust.

4. Conflict of interest issues.

5. Loss of authority.

6. The integrity question - Colleagues will start questioning your judgement in certain matters, thinking you are biased.

7. Misconduct: I witnessed one  among fresh recruits in a bank in Lagos some years ago, that led to the sack of the two randy employees. 

The bank was conducting training for fresh graduates newly hired by the bank before their posting. The head of Human Resources went to the Ladies in the cool afternoon when a training session was going on. She heard a lady's ecstatic cry in one of the toilet cabins. The  Lady was urging her young man to go deeper...hmnnn. The head HR, being a woman was shocked and wondered if these were the fresh graduates that will take the bank to the next level..NO. She waited for them to finish and collected their ID. Your guess is as good as mine, why was that - office romance!

HOW TO AVOID IT

1. Any woman that discusses her family issues to colleagues will one day regret it. STOP IT NOW. Every family has issue, why discuss your husband with small boys in your office who are not even up to your husband?. You are not doing well.

2. Avoid over familiarity with colleagues.

3. Avoid unnecessary play and body contact.

4. If you must discuss your marital challenges, let it be with trusted married women for ladies and married man for men. Never with an opposite sex as it may serve as invitation to dialogue.

5. Be professional, focus on your duties. Take your eyes off the opposite sex.

6. Start no mutual friendship that will build excitement between you and a married man or woman.

7. Resist every demonic instincts and impulse. Fear God in all you do in the office.

8. Don't lust for evil things in your heart. Trust in the Lord for your promotion and work hard.

9. Never you take advantage of peoples challenges to exploit them.

CONCLUSION:

Beloved, there is no temptation that you cannot overcome if you are determined. Married men and women, please make a vow of chastity and God will help you to overcome every office or even market place trial in Jesus name.

Guide yourself, your integrity and marriage. If a mischievous man is daily complimenting you in the office, ask him how many times he complimented his wife and rebuke that serpent. He is looking for a loophole to gain access to your life and marriage.  If there are issues at home, help your spouse to overcome it.

All those who have made this regrettable mistake, repent and cry to God for forgiveness. then you forgive yourself and say NEVER AGAIN to this trap of Satan in Jesus name.

Shalom!

Please feel free to email us for questions, help to overcome any marital challenge and prayers. 

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Love First 1

08:06

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Family

Ladies, establish love before seeking marriage

Marriage can be a great experience when you meet the right person. How do you know you have met the right person - When and wherever you find love. And for a Christian, love can be found anywhere, trust me.

Love is the icings of the cake in every relationship and in life. Everyone is looking for love, but love is very elusive because it cannot be bought with money, it cannot be manufactured and supplied to people seeking it and it cannot be controlled. Love is very costly and as such scarce.

Love requires that you reveal your true self to another person without any fears as to whether he would accept and love you are you are. We all want to be loved and appreciated, but without revealing yourself to the other person, love will be hard to establish. This is why a famous author C.S Lewis said that "To love at all is to be vulnerable” Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken, if you want to make sure it is intact, you must give it to no one"?

Love is sacrificial - meaning that love requires a lot of sacrifices to succeed and where there is love without sacrifice, such love can be easily frustrated.

Love is never hidden. It could be a complex issue, but whenever you fall in love, you will know.  However, you do not know whether the other person is in love with you.  This is why when a lady finds love, over night, she will close every other relationship and focus on the man that has shown her love and care that she cannot deny.

Love comes in different packages; some people in love do quickly want to move the relation to the next level, whether it is the man or the lady.  This is why it appears sometimes that ladies push their lover too hard for marriage.  The reason is that they are in love.  So there is a frequency that comes with love. If the lady is ready and prepared, the marriage can be consummated within months.

A matured sister looking for a husband will need to do the following things:

1. Do a self assessment of yourself and your relationship experiences and decide on areas of your lifestyle that need amendment, aspects of your behaviour that must be laid to rest, the ones that need improvement.  Decide on the areas of life you should seek knowledge to improve yourself generally.

2.  Marriage is a journey of commitment and so you should consider what you're bringing to that marriage that will support the marriage. Where you need additional skills and competencies, don't hesitate to acquire such additional skills. If you're a civil servant,get a vocational skill in trading or distribution business, hairdressing, tailoring, catering, rental and sowing etc. If you desire to further your education, please do so. Marriage is an unpredictable journey of life that anything can happen to change calculations.

3. Determine what you want in a man/ Husband. You must spend some quality time detailing the qualities you need in a man that will marry you. This exercise is not easy, but if you can do it, you will rediscover yourself the more. It should be done in faith without doubting, because you're not the one that will do it, but God.

Don't limit yourself in any way, put your faith to work. If you don't do this, how would you know when your Mr appears? 

4. Decide also to have some borders around you and make sure there are stern-looking guards manning them. The guards will be used to ward-off intruders and other undesirable distractions. Maintain a professional attitude to appointment, time management; no late nights. no sex till your real man comes, no alcohol, no clubbing, no night visit to any guy, no hugging or close kissing.

5. Decide to carry your body in honour always - that means no scanty dressing, no to extremely tight clothes, no amorous dressing. Also, no worldly songs and videos etc.

When the guy comes, the following steps may yet be necessary:

1. Try to understand him - As you engage and interact with him, ask pertinent questions that will help you understand him. Find out his vision and the kind of future he is working towards. Find out about his family, his position in the family as well as his functional position of importance. Discover who his hero is. Who he is aspiring to be like and who is mentoring him. Who is his spiritual father. 

If you can understand him, his vision, then you will be in a better to advice, cheer him up and encourage him. He would also discern your intelligent and importance. In most cases, He would become more open with you, thereby making him available to be understood.

2. Observe Trends: - Observe his language of appreciation and his openness and know what his motivation is - love or lust. You don't have the time to waste on unproductive relationship. Hear me sisters. if he guy is seriously motivated by your looks, your physical outlook and shape, then he is motivated by lust.  Very soon, he will be asking you to visit and cook for him, thereafter he would ask for sex. He would not easily discuss his future plans. You will get regular close-of-work hour and night calls.

If he is in love, he will be open in many areas, would like to meet your friends, know whether you're engaged with anyone. He will call you more often and discuss tangible issues, not how beautiful your pictures on Facebook are. He will be interested in your career, future and so on.

3. Try to establish compatibility: - This is very critical for the success of the marriage. Compatibility here means that both of you agree and share the same belief and goal on many areas of interest. I was writing the final level examination of Institute of Chartered Accountants of Nigeria when I met my wife, an accounting undergraduate. Professionally, we are compatible.

Compatibility means that both of you have same aspiration on certain issues. I knew a young banker who was interested in farming as an entrepreneur. The day he met a graduate who believed in farming as a viable business, he said he knew he had met his wife. 

Compatibility reduces arguement at home, and with few argument at home, there will be peace. You can check for compatibility in many areas including:

1. Education- Are you both graduates?

2. Economic status: Are you both working?

3. Family: Which status -  poor, middle class or wealthy.

4. Culture: Same tribe/language; same state, LGA?

5. Profession: Are you doing the same business e.g farming, marketing, sales & distribution business.

6. Vision for the future: Areas of interest.

7. Number of children desired: Are you on one page?

8. Christian serve: Are you both ministers?

9. Leisure/hobby: Do you share common hobby.

Compatibility is a subjective issue, but sisters are encouraged to shine their eyes. Live the Christian lifestyle of chastity and love and internalize them.

a) Stop having sex for heaven sake. You have the grace to stay without sex for months, even for years. Focus on studying the Word and prayers.

b) Let him know you have a vision and future plan for self and family.

c) Show interest in his vision and efforts, support him in every descent way possible without giving him money.

d) De- emphasize money in your relation. Make no strenuous demands on him.

e). Maintain your discipline; avoid cooking at home and taking to him. Don't entertain late night visits or dates. 

f). Make sure you have dropped your "spinster jacket".  No drinking of alcohol, excess makeups etc. Avoid the the trap of regular visit to his house and cooking for him. If you fall to the pressure that other ladies big and small fall to, then you're not different and soon the man may take advantage of you.

g). Learn to carry your body in honour. Love yourself for who you are, love your beauty, and hold yourself in high esteem.  No scanty dresses.

Get active and serve God actively in your local church group. When you become active in the church group, their activities will fill up your idle time.

Conclusion

In conclusion, it is your duty to discern overt  time if the young man is ready to settle down. If he is not ready to settle down, throwing yourself at him will not produce any result. This is why sex should be excluded in your preliminary relationship. Tell your emotion to keep quite. No manipulations. 

The spiritual aspect of your preparation refers to foundational deliverance to remove every hidden obstacle to your marriage. Evil dedications and the hands of any strongman or woman. If you will have time to join our marriage seminars, you will receive deliverance and prophetic guide and instruction.

Any lady can get married, but only those who are ready to walk in love and be willing to forgive offenses will enjoy succeed.

I pray for you, that God Almighty will help you to prepare well for marriage and marry your own better half.

Please email us for enquiries and support at fireinthebone@gmail.con.

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Affair with a neighbour

07:49

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Top

REAL LIFE STORY

This story is to warn men of the dangers of  sleeping with another man's wife. Some wicked women seduce young bachelors for money to the destruction of such a young men. 

Once, a beautiful woman seeking counsel narrated how every man that sleeps with her die. I ask, where is your husband? At home. So why are you sleeping outside? Nothing!  

Nothing, but three men had died from sleeping with her.  Men, boys beware.

‘I caught my wife panting, sweating in our neighbour’s room’ 

A 59-year-old physically challenged man, Mr Olaiya Adeagbo, has pleaded with an Igando Customary Court in Lagos to dissolve his 23-year-old marriage, accusing his wife of infidelity. 

He told the court on Monday that his wife with whom he had four children, was having an affair with his neighbour. 

“I always received a tip-off from our neighbours that my wife is having an affair with one of our neighbours who was a bachelor. 

“That fateful day, I came back home earlier and could not find her in our room, two of my neighbours told me that they sighted her when she sneaked into her lover’s room. “I went to knock on his door but he refused to open after hearing my voice. 

“I continued knocking and he later opened his door, and I saw my wife hiding behind his door sweating and panting, I greeted her and left.

“After some days, her lover died and my wife disappeared from the house without taking anything and refused to come back. 

“My wife later went to marry another man, who also died after some months of their marriage,” he said.

The petitioner also told the court that his wife fights a lot with their neighbours. “My wife fights a lot, she fought with our pregnant neighbour but the woman died the following morning. “Every house we rented, we are always evicted because of her frequent fighting with me and neighbours; she once stabbed me with a knife” he said. 

He urged the court to terminate the marriage as his life was not safe and that he was no longer interested in the union. 

In her submission, the wife, Mrs Taiwo Adeagbo, 46, also accused her husband of committing adultery. 

She told the court that the man her husband saw her with was her benefactor, not her lover. 

“I am not having any affair with that our neighbour, he was only my benefactor who always meet my needs as my husband is not responsible, but unfortunately he is no more.” she said. 

The mother of four, said her husband had at one point eloped with her best friend. 

“My husband always bring home different women claiming they have one problem or another; he once ran away with my best friend to unknown destination for three-months,” she added. 

She begged the court to grant her husband’s wish and terminate the marriage as she too was no longer interested in the union. 

The President of the court, Mr Adegboyega Omilola, after listening to the couple, adjourned the case to May 10 for further hearing.

Culled from: : http://www.vanguardngr.com

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My husband let me have sex with strangers...

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My husband let me have sex with strangers for a year to try and save our relationship.

Open marriage: Robin and Scott

Robin Rinaldi, 50, would be a dedicated wife at weekends but spent the rest of the week with young lovers in a rented apartment

On paper, Robin Rinaldi had the perfect life: a beautiful home in a sought-after San Francisco neighbourhood, a handsome and devoted husband, a glamorous job as a magazine editor, and a social life that involved attending the city’s most exclusive parties. But there was something missing.

Robin was desperate to have a child, but her husband of 17 years, Scott Mansfield, had other ideas. After failing to persuade Scott to start a family with her, he had a vasectomy, rocking their marriage to the core. 

Robin began to re-evaluate her life. She had always tried to be the ‘good girl’ that her Catholic upbringing demanded, and had had just three sexual partners before she married Scott aged 26.

"I came from a background that taught me sex is something that men took and women gave," says Robin. "After a sexual act, a woman had lost something and 

had given something, and the man had gained or taken something. It just wasn’t possible for me to enjoy any kind of sexual encounter as a youth."

So Robin settled into the kind of well-behaved life she thought was expected of her. But as she grew older, she began to wonder about the passion she had missed out on in her 20s and 30s.

With the sudden realisation that she was never going to be a mother, Robin decided she would need to find fulfilment in another way. "I refused to go to my grave with no kids and only four lovers… If I couldn’t have one, then I needed to have the other."

Robin now has more confidence

A risky decision

Against the advice of her friends, Robin persuaded her husband to agree to an open marriage for one year. The couple spent several weeks deciding a set of rules to govern what Robin dubbed her ‘Wild Oats Project’. The rules were simple – no falling in love, no sleeping with mutual friends, and no unsafe sex. 

In what she knew was a ‘risky and emotionally messy move’, Robin rented a small apartment where she would live during the week, before returning home to quiet, domestic life at the weekends.

She placed an advert on a dating site, choosing her words carefully: "I’m a 44-year-old professional, educated, attractive woman in an open marriage, seeking single men aged 35-50 to help me explore my sexuality. 

"You must be trustworthy, smart, and skilled at conversation as well as in bed. Our time together will be limited to three dates, as I cannot become seriously involved."

Within 24 hours, her inbox was full of messages from prospective suitors, mostly men much younger than her. "I’d never been a stunner, so I knew it wasn’t my fetching photos that reeled them in," says Robin. "It was the fact I was going to let them get away scot-free after three dates. Come what may, I would be ravished, and then they could leave."

The dating began, with Robin opening herself up to a whole new world of men.

"I didn’t think about their intentions," she says. "All I wanted was their maleness, the very thing they most liked giving. I wanted their smells, their grasping hands and hungry mouths. The more maleness I had, the more female I could be."

Robin and Scott agreed not to discuss their love lives to avoid any feelings of jealousy. Their open relationship received mixed reactions from friends – some seemed concerned, while others admired their bravery. 

The men Robin dated came from all different backgrounds: a lawyer, an astrologer, a computer programmer – she even had a tryst with a 23-year-old she met in Las Vegas. 

The only time the three-date-rule was broken was when she met Alden, a writer in his 30s. They began to fall for one another in a serious way, so they cut off all contact. 

Her new-found love life was thrilling and empowering. 

"I’d expended so much effort as a teenager trying to avoid the shameful pity of "being used”. Why had no one ever mentioned the satisfaction of being useful, of sharing pleasure and sustenance through my body?" says Robin. "Sex is just an act where two people share themselves. And it doesn’t disempower me as a woman, and it doesn’t take anything from me."

Robin's husband Scott agreed to an open marriage

Back to reality

During the week, Robin’s life was full of exciting dates, but weekends were comfortably familiar.

"It wasn’t difficult to go from my promiscuous single life back to my cosy domestic life on Fridays," she says. "I looked forward to making Scott dinner, waking up in our bed, walking to brunch in our neighbourhood. But by Monday morning, I was ready to return to work and my rotation of lovers."

Robin’s new lifestyle was about more than just passion. "It wasn’t just the sex that delighted me. It was the food, music, conversation – the intimate glimpse into another person." She relished meeting people from different walks of life and is still friends with some of her lovers.

Robin Rinaldi on This Morning

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